grammasrunamuck

Down 3 lbs yay

Posted on: September 8, 2011

weighed in today  down 3 lbs.

Son asks so” mom when are you going to have the gastric bypass surgery. I do not want to have to see you on the floor and not be able to get up again. I have lost 3 l bs of water  he says . no big deal…its good but everyone loses weight like that.  ”

I am sad now tearfully that my son thinking I will die, but I am not sure on the surgery at all.  It is invasive. It will require the healing process, etc and the same willpower used in diet.  I believe I can do it myself. I know I can, I really do.

I have been through so much pain and hurt I do not want to have more. I just want to do something happy for a change.

I have not had a vacation in 30 yrs or more.  I need to feel like a normal woman, be able to do the things I want ,when I want.

I heard my sons concern, and yet he kids about it , and I know over the last few days my body is not feeling that surgery is right, even though the surgeon at Ellis Bariatric Medicine, thinks it will be successful.

I have to decide soon.  Or not. I have to and want to get thin, be attractive to men.

Ha men. Now that is another story. Been hurt before, and may never be trusting again.   Who knows.   The truth is I am young and want to wear a sexy bathing suit, feel good about me.

I have been walking more in the stores when I go.  Slowly but surely.  I am very upset with me.

I am just wondering if the cpap machine will change any thing .

So for today for now I will see how it goes.

Love you all,

grammasrunamuck  Patti

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